Michael Simon Summer Knitwear

Just because it's summer doesn't mean you can't wear knitwear. I say this both as a person who enjoys knitting and as a person who is perpetually cold.

I also say it as a collector of Michael Simon sweaters. I insist that everyone stop what they're doing and admire these summer-appropriate knits that will help you stay cool while looking insane this summer:

Beach Vest

colorful vest with patchwork of applique beach scenes

Mother of God. There's so much to see. This tender family memory:

close-up of an applique family walking down the beach

These happy couples:

close-up of appliques of two woman in bikinis standing on the beach, and a man and woman sitting together on a beach towel

What do you think this person is doing?

close-up of an applique of a woman sitting on a beach towel with her arms raised

Carnival Cardigan

a black short-sleeved cardigan with beading and appliques that show a carnival scene

Listen, I know this is insane. But look at it. The theme is glorious. The details are incredible. I gasped when I saw it. A new holy grail.

Piñata Cardigan

colorful striped cardigan with fuzzy yarn

I'm mad at how much I like this. The texture is so fun. But I'd probably never wear it, given the fact that it practically invites children to come up and whack you with a stick.

It's probably a sensory nightmare too. I'm unsure of the fiber content, but I'm guessing it's a blend of 55% Heinous and 45% Vile.

Cat Tank Top

a mockneck knit tank top with a white cat and a red heart

I'm not in love with the theme of this one, but I kinda like the shape. I really want to see it on a person. You should buy it and show me.

I also like that some of the details look like stitch markers. Would Michael do something so incredible, so brave, so ridiculous? I think he would.

close-up of a knit heart filled in with small plastic circles stitched on

Rabbit Cardigan

pink short-sleeved cardigan with white dots and three-dimensional crocheted white rabbits around teh collar

Holy shit. I have no words. This one also comes in yellow, in case it was the color that was stopping you from picking it up.

yellow short-sleeved cardigan with white dots and three-dimensional crocheted white rabbits around teh collar

Book Vest

black button-up vest with stacks of colorful books up and down the front

It's always seemed strange to me that there are not many book-themed Michael Simon designs. This vest is fun, though (for once) I'd love to see it in less vibrant colors.

Yellow Grid Cardigan

white short-sleeved cardigans with a yellow grid

I genuinely think this is cute. It looks like something Isabelle from Animal Crossing might wear. Would add to cart.

Backpack Vest

Looks like a regular button-up vest, right? But then you flip it over...

the back of a red button-up vest, with a knit backpack attached

A whole backpack knit onto the back! Even better, it's functional. What would you put in your built-in sweater backpack?

I'm not gonna lie about it. I desperately want this thing.

Beaded Fruit Cardigan

black short-sleeved cardigan with a diagonal grid made of beads; each intersection contains a small beaded fruit

This is just delightful. You cannot go wrong with beaded fruit. To be honest, I might pick it up.

Phone Vest

black button-up vest covered in old-fashioned phones made with colorful beads

If Michael Simon were still making clothes today, do you think he'd make an iPhone vest?

I really wanted to get a landline for our house, by the way. Why? Because it's fun. But it's also surprisingly expensive for something so pointless. This vest would be more of a conversation starter. Buy it.

Hula Hoop Cardigan

short-sleeved cardigan with colorful felt appliques of people hula hooping

This is so jolly. No notes.

Floral "Denim" Vest

faux denim knitted vest covered with colorful flowers

I've come across a few Michael Simon "denim" vests. They're usually insane. I'm intrigued.

This is by far the best one. I think it's kinda cute.

Tennis Vest

colorblock sweater vest with a sequined tennis racket in the middle

What fun! If I played tennis, I would definitely wear this.

Sunflower Cardigan

green short-sleeved cardigan with beaded sunflowers on the sleeves and a large bee button at the top

Nothing says summer like sunflowers. If green's not your thing, there's also a black design:

Judgmental Nutcracker Vest

red button-up vest with a sequined nutcracker

This one is Christmas-themed, but technically you could wear it as a tank top. Mostly I just wanted to share this asshole nutcracker peeking around the corner to judge you and everyone you know.