Posts

2026

July 12: Bought It on iTunes
Someone calls me old, and I go searching through my 24-year-old email account.
July 6: London Trash Talk
Remembering my 2018 trip to London via trash. And a chalk horse.

June 28: Vacuum Island
My life as a no-pencil kid, my favorite sign, and thrift finds.
June 21: Big Wind
A tale of two camping trips, both waylaid by wind.
June 16: It's 10 PM. Do You Know Where Your Pencil Is?
Your quarterly reminder of my long-lost pencil.
June 14: Waxing Hubert
Polishing a statue turns into a poetic exploration of work in the 21st century. Psych. It's just weird job tasks.
June 6: How Far I'll Mow
An update on my lack of gardening prowess.

May 29: Demons' Souls
It should be Demons' Souls, not Demon's Souls. Just let me be pedantic, OK? Also: recent movies and Jerry Springer.
May 20: I Dream of Trash
I have found my perfect career.
May 15: Biscuit, Bad Movies, and $29 Beer
A lady showed off a dog named Biscuit while my mouth was open at the dentist. Why? Why!?
May 11: Frozen Pizza Prophet
A few of my psychic moments. One involved frozen pizza.
May 4: Guinea Pig in Space
An essay about me, my mom, my sister, and our tangled relationship with beauty.

April 26: A Fistful of Toe
That time my college professor shook a woman's big toe during a lecture, and other strange happenings.
April 17: Key Update
A small life update involving a key, criminal justice, movies, and Furbys.
April 4: The Den of Filth
Remembering the awful, moldy, mouse-ridden apartment that I dearly miss.

March 23: Horse Meeting
Horse-themed meetings, weddings, corn domains, and an ancient Disney Channel original movie.
March 16: I Want to Believe
Once there was a pencil. It's still out there somewhere.
March 11: Big Leaf
Meeting a newborn baby; seeing my grandma for possibly the last time.
March 6: It's Not the Worst Thing Happening in the World
Navel-gazing about work.

February 27: Kiko - Fu
On getting lost while driving.
February 24: Toast Reviewed
Some people recommended toasts. I made and reviewed them.
February 17: Furbys Against Fascism
Furbys were once banned by the U.S. government. Now, they rise up. (Free pamphlet and sticker within.)
February 9: Hot Dog City
I dreamt of a hot dog. Also: musings about Sex and the City, Ricky Martin, and more.
February 5: How I Got My Hamster Fluffy
Sharing my award-winning hamster essay with the world.

January 25: Bideo Games
A life update featuring ICE musings and video games.
January 8: A Renaissance of Vegetables
Among other things: why haven't they invented any new vegetables?
January 5: Best of 2025
The best stuff I watched and read in 2025. Whatever.